September 17

Here’s another odd pairing in the series Albums That Are Only Related To Each Other In My Head:

Laniganster and some vinyl

The Village People – Macho Man and Ozzy Osbourne – Diary Of A Mad Man.

In 8th grade, my friend Rick and I were invited to a school dance in a small town 40 miles from where we lived. His cousin, a girl whose name I can’t remember, complained that there were no boys willing to take her and her friend too the school dance.

Rick’s mom and aunt enlisted us for the cause and promised us $10 apiece.

I tried to act cool but I was scared shitless! I knew Rick was too but we couldn’t let on that we were both frightened little boys. Not so much scared of girls, but definitely scared of dancing!

On the appointed night we were both gussied up in the finest older brother-ish borrowed clothes we could find. My date, Rick’s cousin, was really shy and I don’t imagine we said more than a dozen words to each other.

The prom was a disaster! We sat there like wallflowers for couple of hours enduring the disco themed tunes of the day being played on one of those school issued all-in-one record players.

Before we left Rick’s cousin gave him a wrapped package. It was obviously a vinyl record and I don’t recall if it was a late Christmas or an early birthday present. When he opened it he found a copy of Macho Man.

I remember the look on his face, disappointment mixed with amusement. This was not our music! We were boys, men! We listen to rock and roll, not this wussy disco girl stuff! I also remember  his cousin being somewhat embarrassed. Feelings hurt.

We did give it a spin or two, mostly to make fun of it! Geez, girls had such a horrible taste in music!

Fast forward to Christmas time in my junior year of high school. Rick excitedly called me, “you have to come over and hear this!”

Over the Christmas holiday this same cousin had come to town for family dinner and had given Rick Diary Of A Madman as a Christmas gift.

We listened to both of those albums that afternoon back to back and reminisced about our role as dance dates for hire. Macho Man wasn’t half bad!

I never did see Rick’s cousin again or have the opportunity to apologize for being such a boob. So, wherever you are, sorry.